“Because I’m in a lot of movies right now or am on the covers of magazines? I just hope there is something solid behind that.

“Because here’s the thing with ‘it girl’ status. It’s great and amazing that anybody is saying that at all. But how long does that last? I would like to establish myself. I don’t want to just have a moment.”

The article continued,

She admitted that she worries about the way she looks. And because she speaks often candidly to journalists, sharing tidbits about her life that her handlers might consider too personal (like the fact that she takes the anti-anxiety medication Lexapro), she said that she often has others minding her words.

[Lexapro is a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) approved for major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, or panic disorder.]

“Oh, I’m always being briefed by a publicist before I have [interviews],” she said, twirling her braided hair around with her fingers. “They’re like, ‘Come on, you can’t be self-deprecating.’ ”

But that’s just who she is, said Atom Egoyan, who directed “Chloe” … “She’s very self critical. After I would say cut, she always had this expression of frustration, like she didn’t quite get it. But I found that quite endearing, because she’s always feeling there’s more she can do to capture or enhance or clarify.”

[From Amanda Seyfried in full bloom, By Amy Kaufman, Los Angeles Times, May 15, 2010]

~~~

Dealing with anxiety

Like many other creative people, actors may experience anxiety.

Energy psychiatrist Judith Orloff M.D. works with many actors, to help them deal with stage fright or other forms of anxiety. In her book Emotional Freedom, she suggests a number of strategies, including supplements and meditation, and “avoiding caffeine and other stimulants, excessive sugar, and violent newscasts and films.”

For some of her clients, she does prescribe Inderal, at least temporarily – a medication to reduce stage fright by decreasing the fight or flight response.

In my interview with Dr. Orloff, she says, “a better way is that I teach everyone to do a three minute mini-meditation where they learn how to breathe, center themselves, let their thoughts flow by, and focus on something really nurturing and positive, which is a better way, I believe, to learn how to shift your anxiety and really own the moment.”

Also see my site Anxiety Relief Solutions – Multiple drug-free self-help products and programs to relieve social anxiety, stage fright, performance anxiety and other forms of anxiety.

Being self-critical

James Earl Jones says, “I think self-criticism is sort of a given when you’re an actor. It’s also about being curious and not being flippant. Anyone who accepts being in this noble profession is automatically self-critical.”

From post James Earl Jones – being an actor is fun, but you’re self-critical

As I note in my article Being Creative and Self-critical: Healthy criticism can help refine our talents and creative projects in the pursuit of excellence. But when it is based on a excessive perfectionism or an unrealistic self concept, criticism can be destructive and self-limiting, eroding our creative assurance and vitality.

Being self-deprecating can be related to unhealthy self-esteem or feeling like a fraud, and self-criticism can be based in perfectionism.

I’m not saying Amanda Seyfried has any of those issues – but many very talented actors (and other artists) do.

creative anxiety, creativity and anxiety, stress and creativity, anxiety and artistic expression, artists and anxiety, artists and self-criticism

After spending the greater part of my life as an actress and performer, I became a therapist in early 2007.

While I still do a little bit of acting when I have a chance, I now mainly spend my time helping other people to fulfill their creative ambitions or to just learn how to be happier.

The interesting thing to me is how valuable my years as a performer have been in helping others with their issues.

There were things I learned as a young actress years ago that have been incredibly helpful to me throughout my life, many of which I can pass on to my clients.

For example, I had a wonderful voice teacher at drama school, who turned out to be so much more than just a voice teacher and who eventually became a lifelong friend – Mary.

One of the things she used to say was “use it, darling, use it” whenever I was experiencing a strong emotion, particularly something uncomfortable.

What she meant was, remember how it feels to be angry or grief-stricken, so that the next time you need to access that emotion for a role, you can bring it up and associate it to the event that precipitated the emotion.

The reason this is useful for my therapy clients is that I can demonstrate to them that it really is possible to control one’s own emotions – you don’t need to be an actor to do that, although actors get facile at doing it because emotions are their “stock in trade”.

Most ordinary people believe that emotions are something outside of their control, and yet if a person can learn to induce an emotion at will, they can also learn to let it go.

When you’re getting angry but you don’t want to have an outburst you count to ten – isn’t that an example of doing that?

Another exercise we learned at drama school that I’ve found useful later on relates to my own self-identity.

Mary recommended that we spend one day thinking of ourselves as beautiful and noticing how others responded to us. So I put my hair up and wore my best dress and rode around on the London Underground with this mantra in my mind, “I am beautiful, I am beautiful.”

To my amazement, my normally shy timid demeanor was replaced by an aura of confidence and poise and people literally stared at me and paid me a lot more positive attention than usual.

This demonstrates that your beliefs about yourself really do transmit themselves non-verbally and in very subtle ways, to others. Try it sometime!

By the way, I also tried this out in a different way, when I was part of an improvised Italian street theater. I was in my late twenties pretending to be an old “bag lady”, a deaf and dumb beggar who lived for scraps.

Again my perception of myself and my projection of what I believed myself to be got an appropriate response from the people around me – many of whom didn’t even realize that I was part of the street performance going on, and who thought I was the real thing.

Another trick that Mary taught me was, when something is uncomfortable, do it more. When you can accept totally a situation and become comfortable with it, the situation no longer holds any fears for you. That is the premise behind the expression: “What you resist persists but what you befriend will surely end”.

Although everybody is born with a certain predisposed temperament, you can also train yourself to develop a different and more effective personality.

For example, I was a very shy child and young adult. And yet I managed to train myself to be an extrovert.

It felt at first like a new coat that didn’t quite fit, but eventually one day this new persona felt like the real me. I remember how incredibly delighted I felt when my boyfriend’s mother remarked how she couldn’t imagine me being shy!

People tend to believe that their personality is something inevitable, that they cannot change. But in fact you’re personality is remarkably fluid and a lot of it is within your power to choose.

The personality, like the brain, is constantly changing throughout life, and that’s not a bad thing, in fact it’s a good thing for your personal growth.

I remember as a teenager feeling that I could be anybody I wanted to be, and to a large extent I was right.

The thing is, I can still be anybody I want to be.

If I start behaving radically differently of course the people closest to me will be surprised and possibly also discomfited and confused, but that is something I can choose to deal with, and they will eventually learn to accept the changes.

The fact is – and this is a fact – every one of the 50 trillion cells in the human body is discarded and replaced every seven years.

That means that we are literally a whole new human being every seven years. So if I want to recreate myself inside as well as outside, I can.

It may take some willpower and persistence to counter old habits, but it is possible.

The only thing that keeps us locked into our old personality, is the force of memory and habit. They say it takes 21 days to break a habit, so you have to stick with it. and believe it’s possible.

Have you ever looked at an old photograph of yourself and thought to yourself “that doesn’t feel like me, it’s as if I’m looking at another person”?

That’s because you literally are looking at another person, a person with a different set of 50 trillion cells. But your memory is the thread that binds you to the past.

Actors are very fortunate, because they are used to creating themselves anew – it’s what they do.

An actor knows how to use his emotions, channel his energy, take control of his body and mind.

~~~~~

Carmen Lynne is a long-time resident of Redondo Beach and an empathetic and inspiring group leader. She is a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist and Guided Imagery Facilitator, who graduated from HMI in 2007, and a Certified Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Group Facilitator with the NACBT. She is currently studying for her MA in Psychology and plans to gain licensure as a Marriage and Family Therapist.

Carmen currently works in two chronic pain clinics as part of the therapeutic team: Comprehensive Pain Relief Group under Dr. Gregory Smith, MD in Redondo Beach and Care Center for Rehabilitation under Dr. Brenda Klass, PhD in Encino. Before becoming a therapist Carmen worked as an actress, singer, dancer, writer and producer.

Mind Over Mood groups

What does “Mind Over Mood” really mean? It means that your thoughts and emotions – which may feel like rebellious undisciplined children – can in fact, be controlled, with a few simple techniques and tools. Your skill and training as an actor makes you uniquely qualified to employ these very techniques. You do it all the time – you just need to learn how to do it in everyday life.

Mind Over Mood is a course that will literally train your brain. In the same way as physical training develops your muscles and makes you stronger and healthier, this kind of brain training makes you emotionally stronger and healthier by training your brain and giving you the power to control your thoughts and emotions.

If you’re afflicted by thoughts and emotions that hold you back and keep you from fulfilling your potential in any area of your life – here is your opportunity to change that. It’s like being handed the keys to your own power, the control of your own thoughts and emotions.

For more information about the Mind Over Mood groups, visit
www.newhealingjourneys.com

Article provided by the author.

~~~~~~~~

Related Talent Development Resources sites:

Depression and Creativity

Personal Growth Information

Nurturing mental health: acting – quotes, books etc

Also see Change, growth, coaching articles.

personal growth development, personal development, self growth, emotions and personal growth, acting and personal growth

On her Twitter profile, Amanda Bynes says:

i want to be a mom but not til i’m 30 and even if i get married b4 then i still want to wait to have kids til long after i’m married @amandabynes

Anjelica Huston has commented about choosing her creative professional life over motherhood: “I have a very full life and I am very happy with where I am now. I don’t want to change anything.

“I once wanted to have children and it was not my choice not to have children but it hasn’t broken my heart that I haven’t.

“I think unless you’re truly whole-heartedly prepared to make a full-time commitment, you have to really think about it. I certainly wouldn’t adopt children just because everybody in show business seems to be doing it.” [imdb.com]

Many active actors are mothers and make it work, especially when they are successful enough to be able to afford help.

Kyra Sedgwick (TNT series “The Closer”) has commented about how she schedules her time and energy, and mentioned some of her doubts about being away from her children so much.

She works for about half the year in Los Angeles, away from her family in Manhattan: Kevin Bacon and their two teen children.

“I’m more creatively fulfilled than I’ve ever been. This was a choice I made for myself, in hopes that it would be okay for the family and that I would be a role model for my kids to follow their own dreams.

“I don’t wake up at three in the morning panicking. I’ve spent a lot of time with my kids, serious 24-hour time, and we have really good relationships. But I am always wondering, Is this the right thing to do? Honestly, I have no idea.” [Life mag., June 9 2006]

More quotes by other actors on the page Motherhood and creative expression

women artists and motherhood, motherhood and acting, developing creativity, creative potential, psychology of creativity, creative mind

What choices and compromises do you make to gain attention and opportunities as an actor?

Romola Garai has expressed a number of thoughtful perspectives on these topics. Here are some quotes from her imdb.com profile.

On Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights :

“I wouldn’t have done something that I thought had no merit in it at all, but I did experience a fall-out from being calculating about your career, believing that you should do something in order to get you somewhere else. It was just creatively unfulfilling.”

“The filmmakers were obsessed with having someone skinny. I just thought, why didn’t they get someone like Kate Bosworth, if that’s what they wanted? An actress like that wouldn’t worry about whether or not the political ideas were being sensitively or subtly dealt with. They’d do the job, smile and look pretty on the cover of Teen Vogue. There I am, 135 pounds and trying to make art! I was so wrong for it!”

”I had the time of my life. I have used every part of my body, plus muscles I did not know I had, because the dancing is a combination of salsa and Latin ballroom. It felt like daily aerobics.”

On the Vanity Fair premiere: “I [showed] my tits and teeth. I’m useless at it. About 40 per cent of success as an actor is now based on whether you’re good at being interviewed and how you conduct yourself. And I’m really bad at that.”

More on being an actor :

“When I was a child I always wanted to be funny and to please people in my family. As you grow up that instinct becomes more refined, but it’s still there. How can it not be? I just don’t believe you’re capable of being an actor unless you have a desire to experience your emotions in a public way.”

“It’s too simplistic to say that people start to believe what’s written about them. But what happens is that you become a certain way to please people, to be liked, to be what’s expected of you, to change yourself so that you become the best possible version of yourself for people who don’t know you.

“And I think that’s a terrible, pernicious thing.”

[Photo: Romola Garai as Emma Woodhouse in "Emma"]

acting performance, acting self esteem, acting passion, entertainment psychology, actors training, personal development for actors

Joan Chen comments about first seeing “Edward Scissorhands” in 1990:

“Looking back, after almost 20 years, I now understand better the fierce longing and intense loneliness that the film had stirred in me. Like the protagonist, Edward, I was the shy, misunderstood outsider for a large part of my life in America, and again later in China.

“Having experienced the adulation of the millions in my late teens, I became a much reviled traitor, who brought shame to China after leaving for the US and later for playing the part of the mistress to the white man in Tai-Pan.

“The capricious and precarious nature of the mob sentiments was a nightmare, which I knew well. I empathize with the conflicting desire of the artist to retreat to his lonely tower and to be loved by people who appreciate his talent.”

- Actress / Director / Producer / Writer Joan Chen

(Singapore Sun Film Festival, October 2009 – posted on imdb.com; photo: as Yee Tai Tai in Lust, Caution.)

Many other actors and artists are shy and highly sensitive, as Joan Chen seems to be, and to need time and space away from work and the emotional pressures of attention.

For more about the trait, see the Highly Sensitive site.

emotional intensity, overexcitability, excitabilities, gifted and talented, highly sensitive people

Those quotes are from the article Ethan Hawke says ‘Daybreakers’ is no ‘Twilight’: ‘It’s a post-adolescent vampire film’ by Yvonne Villarreal [Los Angeles Times January 7, 2010].

Villarreal continues :

It’s a role [in "Daybreakers"] about as far as you can get from his Broadway gig performing a nine-hour stage trilogy of Tom Stoppard’s plays, “The Coast of Utopia,” about mid-19th century Russian radicals. And that’s what attracted him.

“There’s some kind of actors that can radically change who they are from movie to movie,” Hawke said. “I’ve never really been that kind of actor. I enjoy changing the worlds that I’m in.”

“I’ve been fortunate to be working in the film business for almost 25 years by doing a lot of different things,” he said. “You can’t only do cop pictures and you can’t only do little art-house movies. . . . I kind of figured if I keep trying different things, eventually I would accumulate some kind of learning.”

The learning extends beyond the big screen.

He’s tackled television, guest starring in an episode of ABC’s “Alias,” and is part of the small-screen adaptation of “Moby Dick,” an upcoming two-part miniseries in which he plays Starbuck. And he’s toiled on countless stages, appearing — and directing — numerous theater productions including “Henry IV” and “Hurlyburly.” “The theater, for me, has always been a place where I’m free to be more creative,” he said. “A place to sharpen my tools.”

Music video director? Yes, that too. He directed songstress Lisa Loeb’s music video for “Stay (I Missed You)” in 1994; the hit song was featured on the “Reality Bites” soundtrack. Oh, and he’s written two novels — “The Hottest State” and “Ash Wednesday”; both garnered mixed reviews.

There’s a method to all the madness. “In grade school they say you have to pick a profession and stick to it . . . and people stop looking at their lives as a work in progress,” he said. “If you don’t stay in touch with yourself, you kind of lose focus.

“If you’re going to spend a life in the arts, you need to be infused with a sense of gratitude and a sense of wonder. It’s a privilege to do this profession. But there is a payment you have to make for that privilege, which is to do your best all the time. To challenge yourself. That’s the luxury tax.”

[Photo: Ethan Hawke plays vampire scientist Edward Dalton in Daybreakers.]

~~~

Hawke’s pursuit of multiple talents and passions is a characteristic of many highly talented people – a quality described by Barbara Sher as the Scanner Personality. See her article Are You A Scanner?

developing multiple talents, self-exploration, developing creativity, creative potential, creative personality type

Howard says “The Hollywood scene, these parties, freak me out. I’ve never had a sip of alcohol in my life. I wasn’t interested in losing control.

“There was alcoholism in my family, so I saw the negative effects and how difficult it was to recover.

“When I was in high school, I would never go to parties because I would be embarrassed to say no. Consequently, I had almost no social group.”

She also notes: “When I work on a film, I always tend to relate to the crew. I struggle immensely with celebrities of all forms. I get clammy hands and turn a little purple.” [From Too Good to be True, by Peter Davis, Papermag.]

In creating and playing her character, she found, “I learned some interesting things about myself. Fisher is unapologetic about anything she does or says, and I am not; in fact I am apologizing all the time.

“I liked that she was almost hedonistic in her approach to life, and I connected to that side of myself that wants to be fearless.

“Also I learned that moving through the making of this film with the many obstacles, I watched Jodi [director Jodi Markell] do so with such grace, and I tried to follow her example, to handle whatever life throws at me with that sense of wonderful grace”, she says with a slight laugh, “and I hope I continue to do that going forward.” [incontention.com]

I don’t know her, and I’m not saying she is shy or a highly sensitive person, but in a number of her interviews – and her comments above – Bryce Dallas Howard talks about thoughts and emotional reactions that sound to me like shyness and high sensitivity.

And many other highly talented actors do share those qualities.

The trait of high sensitivity is experienced by 15 to 20 percent of us. In my video On Being Sensitive are quotes by and about Winona Ryder, Heath Ledger, Amy Brenneman, Scarlett Johansson, Anne Hathaway, and Ellen DeGeneres about their experience of sensitivity.

Also see my related video Shy actors: Vanessa Hudgens, Sigourney Weaver, Taye Diggs – and the Highly Sensitive site.

shy personality, introverted personality, high sensitivity personality, highly sensitive relationships

“My life was crushed when they told me ‘No.’ But I was 17, it was a long time ago and rejection like that only makes you stronger, gets you asking — how can I better myself?” [thetvaddict.com]

On body image

[Have you noticed any pressure in Hollywood regarding your size?]

“I actually noticed it more when I was younger which is why I stopped, it was getting to my self-esteem. But once I learned I am not my dress size and to never let anyone put me in a box, I was more content with being myself and letting the world see my light shine.”

[Young, Fat, & Fabulous youngfatandfabulous.com]

Also see more quotes on Body image.

women and talent, women developing creativity, negative body image, acting and rejection

Scarlett Johansson has noted that sensitivity can have a dark side: “I think I was born with a great awareness of my surroundings and of other people. Sometimes that awareness is good, and sometimes I wish I wasn’t so sensitive.”

Everyone has some sensitivity to inner experiences and emotions, to the moods of others, and to many other sensations. But highly sensitive people have unusually strong awareness and reactivity, and are more likely to be shy.

From my article Using Your High Sensitivity Personality As an Actor.

highly sensitive actors, introverted actors, shy personality, introverted personality, high sensitivity personality

And then I took it a step further because they wanted me to look really downtrodden, so I actually drank wine so I was hung over and I put mascara in my hair to give myself really bad roots.

Jim Parsons (“The Big Bang Theory”): Is that what we call Method?

Benz: It’s called “I want the job.” I signed in and sat down, and they came out and were looking around, and I heard them saying, “Well, she signed in, but where is she?” I finally said, “I’m right here.” And they said, “Are you wearing prosthetic makeup?”

Parsons: Wow, you had the best compliment and the worst insult in 24 hours!

~~~~

Lea Michele (“Glee”) I’ve never been through a TV process before. I’ve been on auditions, but I’ve been working in musical theater in New York since I was 8 years old.

I came out to L.A. after my most recent Broadway show, and I just wanted to be on “Grey’s Anatomy.” I wanted to be a bloody victim of some kind of car crash, and I end up going out for “Glee.”

I had to sing two musical theater songs and a pop song, plus read 800 sides. That whole part was comfortable for me; it was normal. But the whole “You’re going to go to the studio, then you’re going to go to the network”—I had no idea what any of that meant.

And maybe that was good, because I didn’t understand it and just thought of it as a callback. For my last callback, I got into this terrible car accident pulling into the Fox lot, left my smoking car on Pico Boulevard, and ran into the audition with glass in my hair.

They were saying, “We heard Lea Michele just got into a car crash!” I was like, “No, I’m here, I’m totally fine.”

It was such a Rachel Berry thing to do: literally leave the smoking car on Pico and run to the audition. But I auditioned, and they told me in the room that I got it.

I hate auditioning.

Jim Parsons : I love auditioning.

Julie Benz (“Dexter”): Me, too. It’s a competitive sport to me.

Parsons: Me, too. Go, fight, win! First of all, I enjoy working on anything.

Benz: I look at it as, it’s literally your time to be an actor that day. And it’s a performance; that’s all it is. I don’t look at it as a job; it’s my time to play the part how I want to play it. And I throw my material away when I leave. You learn to love it.

Michele: I want that to be my mantra. I get really, really nervous. I come from the world of singing at auditions, which is a whole added stress.

~~~

Back Stage: Do you remember your worst audition?

Benz: I have a tendency to just say what I’m thinking. I walked into this room, and it was a big movie, and the director looked at me and goes, “You remind me of my ex-girlfriend,” and went on and on about how horrible his ex-girlfriend was.

He hated her so much and said I was the spitting image of her. I finally looked at him and said, “I should just leave. I don’t even think I should audition.” And I left.

Michele: My problem is, going on auditions, I was brought up so when you get in that room, you do whatever you can to get the job. So whatever they ask me, I say, “Yes, I can do it!” I went in for a gymnastics movie, and they had a form you had to fill out, asking things like, “Can you do back flips?”

I filled out the whole thing, completely lying about everything I could do. And I got in the room, and they said, “It says here you’re working on the beam.” I said, “Yep, working on the beam, hope to get to the vault soon!”

I completely lied. And when I got a callback, I realized I couldn’t go in. I couldn’t do anything I’d said I could do.

From Prime Time – Who’s in the Running: Television Actors, By Jenelle Riley, Back Stage, November 18, 2009

acting talent, acting performance, training as actor, developing creativity, creative expression, audition confidence, acting careers